Morally Not Myself

Found out some of the sons of a pastor who was once my best friend actually bought a bar together. Their father betrayed me and left me homeless as well as my own family …

So many families from my home church as well are all broken up and their kids living more worldly than ever. They were never in the truth with celebrating pagan holidays, so much entertainment and materialism …  but I was among the people they abandoned to my struggles …

A lot of you know that my spiritual will is depleted. I’m afflicted and my heart is very heavy. Listening to gospel music or praying actually causes me emotional anguish …

I spent so much time praying for issues in the churches. I did the same for both my marriages and desperately did so as well as fasting over the house hold of the second marriage …

I hate being alone, it’s impossibly difficult to sleep right. I miss my kids, and hobbies and home responsibilities. I honestly cannot be myself when I’m at a job because so many other employees have no respect for those rare people with my kind of moral values …

There are many more things I could include here, but my point is that I now live over this bar and have had no luck finding a better place to move. I’m in a different job now where I won’t be making as much. I have to work less hours because my back and legs can’t handle it. I’ll be fortunate to have next months rent …

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